Choosing Hymns

Here are some popular hymns that may give you an idea about what to include during the service. Your loved one may of course have had their own favorites or left instructions of their own choice

All things bright and beautiful

Chorus
All things bright and beautiful,
All creatures great and small,
All things wise and wonderful:
The Lord God made them all.

Each little flower that opens,
Each little bird that sings,
He made their glowing colours,
He made their tiny wings.

Chorus

The purple-headed mountain,
The river running by,
The sunset and the morning
That brightens up the sky.

Chorus

The cold wind in the winter,
The pleasant summer sun,
The ripe fruits in the garden:
He made them every one.

Chorus

The tall trees in the greenwood,
The meadows for our play,
The rushes by the water,
To gather every day.

Chorus

He gave us eyes to see them,
And lips that we may tell
How great is God Almighty,
Who has made all things well.

Chorus

Unknown author

Amazing Grace

Amazing grace! How sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me!
I once was lost, but now am found;
Was blind, but now I see.

‘Twas grace that taught my heart to fear,
And grace my fears relieved;
How precious did that grace appear
The hour I first believed.

Through many dangers, toils and snares,
I have already come;
‘Tis grace hath brought me safe thus far,
And grace will lead me home.

When we’ve been there ten thousand years,
Bright shining as the sun,
We’ve no less days to sing God’s praise
Than when we’d first begun.

Unknown author

God be in my head

God be in my head, and in my understanding;

God be in my head, and in my looking;

God be in my head, and in my speaking;

God be in my head, and in my thinking;

God be in my head, and in my departing;

Sarum Primer, 1558

At the name of Jesus

At the name of Jesus ev’ry knee shall bow,
ev’ry tongue confess him King of glory now.
‘Tis the Father’s pleasure we should call him Lord,
who from the beginning was the mighty Word.

At his voice creation sprang at once to sight,
all the angel faces, all the hosts of light,
thrones and dominations, stars upon their way,
all the heav’nly orders in their great array.

Humbled for a season to receive a name
from the lips of sinners unto whom he came,
faithfully he bore it spotless to the last,
brought it back victorious, when from death he passed.

In your hearts enthrone him; there let him subdue
all that is not holy, all that is not true;
crown him as your Captain in temptation’s hour:
let his will enfold you in its light and pow’r.

Brothers, this Lord Jesus shall return again,
with his Father’s glory, with his angel train;
for all wreaths of empire meet upon his brow,
and our hearts confess him King of glory now.

Caroline Noel, 1870

Dear lord and father of mankind

Dear Lord and Father of mankind,
forgive our foolish ways:
reclothe us in our rightful mind;
in purer lives your service find,
in deeper reverence praise,
in deeper reverence praise.

 In simple trust like theirs who heard,
beside the Syrian sea,
the gracious calling of the Lord
let us, like them, obey his word:
‘Rise up and follow me,
rise up and follow me!’

 O sabbath rest by Galilee!
O calm of hills above,
when Jesus shared on bended knee
the silence of eternity
interpreted by love,
interpreted by love!

With that deep hush subduing all
our words and works that drown
the tender whisper of your call,
as noiseless let your blessing fall
as fell your manna down,
as fell your manna down.

Drop your still dews of quietness,
till all our strivings cease;
take from our souls the strain and stress,
and let our ordered lives confess
the beauty of your peace,
the beauty of your peace.

Breathe through the heats of our desire
your coolness and your balm;
let sense be dumb, let flesh retire,
speak through the earthquake, wind and fire,
O still small voice of calm,
O still small voice of calm!

John Greenleaf Whittier, 1807

Great is thy faithfulness

“Great is Thy faithfulness, ” O God my Father,
There is no shadow of turning with Thee;
Thou changest not, Thy compassions, they fail not
As Thou hast been Thou forever wilt be.

“Great is Thy faithfulness!” “Great is Thy faithfulness!”
Morning by morning new mercies I see;
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided—
“Great is Thy faithfulness, ” Lord, unto me!



Summer and winter, and springtime and harvest,
Sun, moon and stars in their courses above,
Join with all nature in manifold witness
To Thy great faithfulness, mercy and love.

“Great is Thy faithfulness!” “Great is Thy faithfulness!”
Morning by morning new mercies I see;
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided—
“Great is Thy faithfulness, ” Lord, unto me!


Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth,
Thine own dear presence to cheer and to guide;
Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow,
Blessings all mine, with ten thousand beside!

“Great is Thy faithfulness!” “Great is Thy faithfulness!”
Morning by morning new mercies I see;
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided—
“Great is Thy faithfulness, ” Lord, unto me!

Thomas Obediah Chisholm,1866

O Lord my god

O Lord, my God, when I in awesome wonder
Consider all the worlds Thy Hands have made
I see the stars, I hear the rolling thunder
Thy power throughout the universe displayed

Then sings my soul, my Saviour God, to Thee
How great Thou art, how great Thou art
Then sings my soul, my Saviour God, to Thee
How great Thou art, how great Thou art

And when I think of God, His Son not sparing
Sent Him to die, I scarce can take it in
That on the Cross, my burden gladly bearing
He bled and died to take away my sin

Then sings my soul, my Saviour God, to Thee
How great Thou art, how great Thou art
Then sings my soul, my Saviour God, to Thee
How great Thou art, how great Thou art

When Christ shall come with shout of acclamation
And lead me home, what joy shall fill my heart
Then I shall bow with humble adoration
And then proclaim, my God, how great Thou art

Then sings my soul, my Saviour God, to Thee
How great Thou art, how great Thou art
Then sings my soul, my Saviour God, to Thee
How great Thou art, how great Thou art

Stuart Keene Hine, 1899

The king of love

The King of love my Shepherd is,
Whose goodness faileth never;
I nothing lack if I am his
And he is mine for ever.

Where streams of living water flow
My ransomed soul he leadeth,
And where the verdant pastures grow
With food celestial feedeth.

Perverse and foolish oft I strayed,
But yet in love he sought me,
And on his shoulder gently laid,
And home, rejoicing, brought me.

In death’s dark vale I fear no ill
With thee, dear Lord, beside me;
Thy rod and staff my comfort still,
Thy cross before to guide me.

Thou spread’st a table in my sight;
Thy unction, grace bestoweth:
And O what transport of delight
From thy pure chalice floweth!

And so through all the length of days

Thy goodness faileth never;
Good Shepherd, may I sing thy praise
Within thy house for ever.

Henry William Baker, 1868

Living Lord

Lord Jesus Christ you have come to us
You are one with us, Mary’s Son.
Cleansing our souls from all their sin
pouring Your love and goodness in
Jesus our love for you we sing,
living Lord.

Lord Jesus Christ now and every day
Teach us how to pray, Son of God.
You have commanded us to do
this in remembrance Lord of you
Into our lives your power breaks through,
living Lord.

Lord Jesus Christ, you have come to us
Born as one with us, Mary’s Son.
Led out to die on Calvary,
risen from death to set us free,
living Lord Jesus help us see
You are Lord.

Lord Jesus Christ I would come to you
live my life for you, Son of God.
All your commands I know are true,
your many gifts will make me new,
into my life your power breaks through,
living Lord.

Patrick Appleford, 1925

Lord of all Hopefulness

Lord of all hopefulness, Lord of all joy,
Whose trust, ever childlike, no cares could destroy,
Be there at our waking, and give us, we pray,
Your bliss in our hearts, Lord,
At the break of the day.

Lord of all eagerness, Lord of all faith,
Whose strong hands were skilled at the plane and the lathe,
Be there at our labours and give us, we pray,
Your strength in our hearts, Lord,
At the noon of the day.

Lord of all kindliness, Lord of all grace,
Your hands swift to welcome, Your arms to embrace.
Be there at our homing, and give us, we pray,
Your love in our hearts, Lord,
At the eve of the day.

Lord of all gentleness, Lord of all calm,
Whose voice is contentment, whose presence is balm,
Be there at our sleeping, and give us, we pray,
Your peace in our hearts, Lord,
At the end of the day.

Joy Struther, 1931

Loves divine, all loves excelling

Love divine, all loves excelling,
joy of heav’n, to earth come down,
fix in us Thy humble dwelling;
all Thy faithful mercies crown.
Jesus, Thou art all compassion;
pure, unbounded love Thou art;
visit us with Thy salvation;
enter ev’ry trembling heart.

 Breathe, O breathe Thy loving Spirit
into ev’ry troubled breast!
Let us all in Thee inherit;
let us find the promised rest.
Take away the love of sinning;
Alpha and Omega be;
end of faith, as its beginning,
set our hearts at liberty.

Come, Almighty, to deliver;
let us all Thy life receive;
suddenly return and never,
nevermore Thy temples leave.
Thee we would be always blessing,
serve Thee as Thy hosts above,
pray and praise Thee without ceasing,
glory in Thy perfect love.

Finish then Thy new creation;
pure and spotless let us be.
Let us see Thy great salvation
perfectly restored in Thee.
Changed from glory into glory,
till in heav’n we take our place,
till we cast our crowns before Thee,
lost in wonder, love, and praise.

Charles Wesley, 1747

Abide with me

Abide with me! Fast falls the Eventide;
The darkness thickens. Lord, with me abide
When other helpers fail, and comforts flee,
Help of the helpless, O abide with me!

Swift to its close ebbs out life’s little day;
Earth’s joys grow dim, its glories pass away:
Change and decay in all around I see.
O Thou who changest not, abide with me!

Not a brief glance I beg, a passing word;
But as Thou dwellst with thy disciples, Lord,
Familiar, condescending, patient, free, —
Come, not to sojourn, but abide with me.

Come not in terrors, as the King of kings;
But kind and good, with healing in Thy wings,
Tears for all woes, a heart for every plea.
Come, Friend of sinners and thus bide with me.

Thou on my head in early youth did smile,
And though rebellious and perverse meanwhile,
Thou hast not left me, oft as I left Thee.
On to the close, O Lord, abide with me!

I need thy presence every passing hour.
What but thy grace can foil the Tempter’s power?
Who like Thyself my guide and stay can be?
Through cloud and sunshine, O, abide with me!

I fear no foe with thee at hand to bless;
Ills have no weight, and tears no bitterness.
Where is death’s sting? where grave thy victory?
I triumph still, if Thou abide with me.

Hold then thy cross before my closing eyes;
Speak through the gloom, and point me to the skies.
Heaven’s morning breaks, and Earth’s vain shadows flee!
In life, in death, O Lord, abide with me!

Henry Francis Lyte, 1847

He who valient be

He who would valiant be ‘gainst all disaster
Let him in constancy follow the Master
There’s no discouragement shall make him once relent
His first avowed intent to be a pilgrim

Who so beset him round with dismal stories
Do but themselves confound – his strength the more is
No foes shall stay his might; though he with giants fight
He will make good his right to be a pilgrim

Since, Lord, Thou dost defend us with Thy Spirit
We know we at the end, shall life inherit
Then fancies flee away! I’ll fear not what men say
I’ll labor night and day to be a pilgrim

Unknown

Check out these other sites as well for helpful tips on hymns and songs to choose for a funeral;-

https://www.yourfuneralchoice.com/choose-perfect-funeral-songs/

Choosing a Funeral Director

Helpful tips when choosing a Funeral Director

  1. Word of mouth is the most  common way of choosing a Funeral Directors but its always worth looking online. 
  2. When looking on line and reviewing costs do not just accept the initial prices highlighted at face value.  Often costs are shown without added extras, which can change the cost dramatically.  You may find independent funeral directors are often cheaper than perhaps some of the national funeral directors.
  3. Independent funeral directors can often accommodate your chosen funeral /cremation date whereas this is not always possible for the national funeral directors.
  4. Most funeral directors will go anywhere which means you can choose one based outside of your area.
  5. When creating your order of service its not uncommon to choose up to eight photos of your loved ones.
  6. Most music is now provided by Wesley Media. Once you have chosen your track you can then inform your funeral director who will source it. Once downloaded it is sent to the requested crematorium of your choice. 
  7. Never be afraid to ask your funeral director if you want something to be placed with your loved one. … most anything can be buried except if its a green burial.  Watches with batteries, lighters and pace makers are not suitable for cremations.
  8. When you are asked for your loved ones clothes for burial/cremation remember to provide the complete outfit including undergarments and shoes although shoes are not needed for cremation.
  9. Remember a funeral does not have to be all religious, you need to think about if you want a celebrant, vicar or humanist.  A humanist will not use any religion material whatsoever.
  10. Although it can feel very daunting and upsetting visiting your chosen funeral directors often after your visit you will feel more at peace and rest assured regarding the arrangements.

Courtesy of  Paul J.Rowland Funeral Directors

www.paulrowlandfunerals.co.uk

Choosing a Crematorium

It is not well known that everyone has a choice when choosing the crematorium. You do not need to choose your local crematorium and it is always worth looking around as some can be quite uninviting or maybe too modern for your taste. Perhaps view a few to help you decide which one suits the memory of your loved one.

Local authority run crematoriums tend to be better value than privately run crematoriums.

Availability for booking a funeral is normally determined by the Funeral Director you choose. If they have lots of bookings they won’t be able to fit your required timescale. Don’t be afraid to shop around as another Funeral Director may have more capacity to enable your timescale to be met.

You do not have to stick with the funeral director that collects your loved ones. You can choose who you want to entrust your loved one to.. do not be afraid to shop about.

Pick music that reflects the person that has passed. Don’t be afraid of making the service about celebrating the person that has passed. It should be more about celebrating the life rather than mourning the loss.

Some crematoriums allow visual tributes so memories can be shared during the service. Some also offer webcasting to accommodate family abroad, or if there is family that cannot attend on the day. The webcasting is available for up to ten days on line – copies of the webcast and visual tributes can also be purchased if required.

It’s not just about remembering your loved ones at the funeral, there are so many more ways of remembering them. Did you know ashes can now be put into art as well as well as tattoos and jewelry; don’t be afraid to ask for this information whether it be the funeral director, funeral arranger or crematorium staff.

Some crematoriums are relaxed and you can conduct your own service.. always ask if this is your preference. Most cremation will do what they can to accommodate.

Financial Support following a death in the family

The friends and family that are left behind can face difficult times ahead coping with the death along with the financial worries if that extra income is lost to the house hold, the deceased did not have a funeral plan or perhaps insurance in place. Even if you have been left money in a will this is often not available until after all the legal formalities have been sorted out and this can take some considerable time.

You may be entitled to receive some benefits when you lose a loved one within the family. A great resource for this of course in the direct.gov website where you can check your eligibility and process your claim. Here are a few details of how you may be entitled to claim:

Bereavement Support Payment (monthly payments)
You may be able to get Bereavement Support Payment if your husband, wife or civil partner died on or after 6 April 2017.

You could be eligible if your partner either:
Paid National Insurance contributions for at least 25 weeks.

Died because of an accident at work or a disease caused by work.

When they died you must have been:
Under State Pension age

Living in the UK or a country that pays bereavement benefits.

You can’t claim Bereavement Support Payment if you’re in prison.
Monthly payment depends on the details you submit on the payment calculator: https://www.gov.uk/benefits-calculators

How to help someone who is grieving

When our family members or close friends lose someone, their grief can seem overwhelming. It can leave us feeling helpless or unsure how we can best support them. Whereas it is human nature to feel sympathetic, it is not always easy to show it. In our blog, we will cover some key tips and resources on how to help a grieving person.

Focus on their experience

If you have been through grief in your life, you may well have useful insights to share. It could be that some of the things that helped you at the time will help in this situation too. However it is also easy to forget some of those stages of grief and not all of us experience grief in the same way. Try not to shift the focus of the conversation too much in the direction of your own story. Answer questions about your experience if you feel comfortable doing so. Being available, sometimes just to listen, is often the best support. 

Try not to overanalyse 

We are all individuals and the grieving process can vary widely from person to person. It may take longer for some people to be able to do every day tasks. They may lose sleep or struggle to eat. They may be angry or depressed. All of these things can be expected for some time. If you are worried about their safety or mental health, seek professional advice.

Accept grief

Grief has to come out. You may feel the urge to offer a distraction but this may not work or have a very temporary affect. Your friend or relative may not want to divert their attention away from how they feel. They may prefer to cry indoors and that is fine. 

Suggest professional help

We can only do so much and sometimes professional help such as therapy is what is called for. 

In the case of children, a specialist in childhood bereavement will have experience of helping specific age groups deal with difficult feelings of loss and heartbreak. They will also be able to offer guidance for those closest to the child, including teachers. There are often activities that can help a child to express their emotions rather than having to find the words. 

Religion

Some of us find solace in our religious beliefs during a time of grief. It can be a time when people return to their place of worship after some time away. Support from other members of the church, temple or mosque can be really important in a time of grief. Your friend or relative may ask for prayers or a candle to be lit in memory of the deceased and in support of those left behind. 

Podcasts and digital media

Grief is becoming more widely talked about in the mainstream media. Your friend or relative might get some comfort from listening to a podcast such as The Griefcast, hosted by comedians and very highly praised by fans and critics. You may also find online forums with support from people who have lost loved ones in the same circumstances.

Giving something back

For some people, raising money for a charity or research group trying to reduce deaths by a particular disease or condition is a great way to feel like the death was not in vain. It can feel empowering and a fitting tribute for the person who has lost their loved one to make a contribution in the name and memory of the deceased.